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1994-02-15
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EVANGELIST WARS PLAYER DOC
Welcome, Brethern, to Evangelist Wars. Do you think you
are one of the chosen? Do you think that GAWD will choose
you over all the other Evangelists? There is only one way
to find out....Evangelist Wars.
Evangelist Wars is a game for 1 to 50 players. The object of
the game is to gain favor in the eyes of GAWD and win the Heresy
House Ministry. There are numerous ways to do this. Which ways work
for you will depend on your righteousness level and how you
have chosen to play the game. You must either be
a really good preacher or a really bad one...remember, in
Evangelist Wars all fence sitters go to hell.
Looking at the main menu we have the following choices:
A). Buy a Church - Let's face it, this is the nineties, and
no self respecting preacher would be caught dead
delivering a sermon on top of Mount Olives. The better
the location of your church, the larger the capacity, and
the more sucke-uh, members you can squeeze in, the
bigger the offerings.
B). View your statistics - This gives you a preview of how you're doing.
It tells you where your church is located and how many members are
in your congregation. Some other important information like radio
and TV time will come into effect when the sysop runs the nightly
maintenance. Having a choir is important...so if your stats say
you don't have a choir then it may be time to recruit some choir
members. Money can be used to buy different things like, whores,
churches and bibles...just to name a few. If you see you've been
involved in a scandal, you'd better go ask for forgiveness. The
different equipment you can acquire ranges from a certificate to
a golden cross...any self respecting evangelist wouldn't be caught
dead without these items. Oh, the one last thing in the stats is the
drunk level...if you've tipped one too many it will show on the
drink stats...no one knows for sure how drinking affects your
ability to preach.
C). Move to another street - If you've decided that your current street
isn't paying enough, it may be time to relocate. This is your
chance to check out the available real estate in the better
parts of town.
D). Pass out Literature - "Good things come to those that wait" and you
may have to wait awhile passing out Literature about your church
before your church fills up.
E). Buy Radio Time - A lot better than standing around handing out
literature in the hot sun...don't expect to see immediate results.
Radio time is decided during Maintenance.
F). Buy TV Time - Join the ranks of the best known TV Evangelist.
Sucker those poor old ladies out of as much money as possible.
MUCH, MUCH, better than Radio time or passing out Literature
for bringing in the big bucks, although the viewers are not
apt to show up as church members.
G). Spy on another Evangelist - You can't make it to the top without
stepping on a few toes. This is the best way to check out your
fellow evangelist...if one is getting too strong, Sabotage him.
H). Visit Jimmy Swaggerstick - This man sells everything the evangelist
of today needs. Visit Jimmy to get the latest in Evangelist
fashion.
I). Visit the WhoreHouse - There's nothing wrong with going here.
Where else could you bring lost sheep back into the fold? I
have heard rumors that this is the ideal place to go to sabotage
another evangelist.
J). Go to Church - Well you are a preacher aren't you? If you don't
preach how do you expect to take those suckers for their money?
X). Quit Game - For the weak in spirit. If you hit this I hope you
passed the offering plate first.
Let's take a look at the Whorehouse menu.
A). Convert Whores to your religion - Not for the weak of heart. If
you're successful you will pick up new members for your congregation.
If you're not successful...well, find out for yourself.
B). Sabotage another Evangelist - The perfect chance to stab one of your
fellow evangelists in the back. Be forewarned this is not cheap.
C). Buy a drink - After a hard day of preaching and passing out
literature, you may want to pause here for a quick drink. Almost
everything under the sun is offered here.
X). Exit the whorehouse - Returns you back to the main menu.
There are a few things you might want to do before you hold
a church service. The following options are available.
A). Recruit Choir - This is your chance to recruit a choir. Every
self respecting church has one and you'll need one too. The
bigger your choir the better.
B). Hold a service - Once you've packed your hall of worship
with members and finished your other business in town,
it's time to hold a service. Save enough time to do this,
especially if you're involved in any sex scandals.
C). Make a pass at your secretary - Well what the heck? You are a man,
right? You have needs, right? Just don't forget to wear a condom.
D). Smack a choirboy - Show 'em that singing out of tune is not
tolerated in your church. Careful, just don't get caught.
E). Dust the Pews - Hmmm what a neat idea. Do a good deed and maybe
get rewarded.
X). Exit Church - Takes you back to the main menu.
Finally the Church service menu
A). Faith Healing - Call on the power of GAWD to heal crippled members
of your congregation. Some of your more conservative church members
may not appreciate this or believe in it.
B). Preach Sermon - Choose the topic and hope like hell you don't
bore the congregation.
C). Bible reading - Read a passage out of the Bible.
D). Have the choir sing - What else did you want to do with the Choir??
E). Alter Call - Have members of the congregation come forward to REPENT
thier sins to GAWD!
F). Beg Forgiveness - Have you been a naughty boy that got caught? Hmm
you'd better hope they believe your story.
G). Cry - it's a cheap shot, but it just might save your career someday.
X). Pass the offering Plate - Knowing when to do this is the
most important part of being an evangelist. Get 'em worked
up to a peak before you pass it, but don't overdo it or
they'll get bored and walk out. Know your congregation
well, and give them what they like.
Hints: WATCH YOUR TIME REMAINING! If you run out of time
for the day without passing the offering plate, you
will get no offering.
Relocate your church on the highest street possible.
Try to keep your church full. Everytime you move, it will
accept more members.
Buy Radio and TV time if you can afford it.
When you try to sabotage another Evangelist, remember that
you get what you pay for.
Don't pass the offering plate until the congregation is impressed
with your sermon.
This ought to get you started. There are alot of surprises in the game,
and i wouldn't want to spoil those for you. ENJOY!